If you’re like me, you might be surprised with your answer.
When it comes to some of life’s more interesting experiences, do you choose trial or delight?
Recently, I was in a situation that meant living in an environment where the air con was on permanently. ‘Off’ wasn’t an option.
Now, if you know me, you know I’m not an air con-girl. I need fresh air so that my cells can thrive – especially whilst I’m sleeping.
As you can imagine, not being able to stop the air con saw me doing plenty of huffing and puffing about it.
I resisted. I got my knicks well and truly in a twist (a favourite phrase of my no-nonsense mum; she didn’t mince her words).
The following morning, after a restless night, I woke up frazzled and realized I had a choice. 1
I could take less this less than desirable air con situation as an opportunity in disguise.
It was my doorway to make an important distinction: I could choose to either suffer and winge about it, or I could make the choice to become more resilient.
I could (if I chose to) actually step up and find ways to help my body deal with the challenges (especially the chilling effect, and recycling of air and potential bugs.)
The following night, I decided to go for delight instead of trial, and although it wasn’t my ideal situation, I woke up actually feeling grateful. Grateful that I chose the other fork in the road marked ‘resilience’.
Do you have a part of you that can relate?
My take here is that finding a way to turn a situation around is sometimes (read ‘often’) an opportunity to shift from it being disempowering to empowering.
It can even change our body chemistry for the better.
So that’s my invitation to you – to keep your beady eyes peeled for an opportunity to make your own choice – trial or delight?
Ciao for now – ‘til I see you on this week’s #AliveWithFi
1In both situations we like and those we like less, when it comes down to it, most things are out of our control. However, we can control our response. That requires looking “through the frame of choice” which has a more positive connotation and “is a close sibling of freedom.” So, to “choose wisely I have to be able to choose from within me — and not according to all available external options” This is living intentionally, and “it frees me from a reactive, outside-in notion that I have to conform with the world around me. Instead, it leads me to create, inside-out, the experiences I want to live that will generate the sensations and feelings I want to savor.”
“Control is Not the Answer: The Liberating Power of Choosing Your Intention” G. Curi (2018).
Awesome
Hmm. I think this is a really major one, certainly for me and perhaps ultimately for all of us as human beings – that choice of ‘ do I take this as an opportunity – or as a problem? ‘. I’ve been told the Japanese word for problem is also the word for opportunity – if that so, then it perfectly encapsulates this freedom of choosing how I can think about things.
And I agree with you, Fi, that this is ultimately where our freedom lies, in being able to choose our response.
Which is not to minimise the fact that sometimes we, or other people, may find ourselves in a very tight spot indeed! I feel very blessed and grateful that I have not, as yet, found myself in, for example, a refugee camp or similar.
And yet I remember hearing a charity worker talking about the different responses of people in the refugee camp she was working in, And how she and her colleagues actively sought out people with a positive mindset, because she knew that the charitable funding that they had to give would be put to positive use by those positive – thinking people.
Which makes me also think that when we change our “frame” of reference that we “look through“ to a more positive one, then we also attract from universe more positive opportunities! How fascinating life is!
And of course, like you say, the challenge is actually doing it! Easy in theory, but often very challenging in practice!
Loving what is…